Feeling like a fish out of water is an experience many of us can relate to. This common idiom paints a vivid picture of discomfort and lack of belonging. But where did this peculiar phrase come from, and what exactly does it mean?
As an idiom, “fish out of water” refers to someone who is struggling to fit in or acclimate to a new environment or situation. Just as a fish would quickly die if removed from the water, a person in unfamiliar territory can flounder helplessly. The expression evokes the awkwardness we feel when we’re out of our element.
The Origins of “Fish Out of Water”
While the precise origin of “fish out of water” is unclear, early usages can be traced back to the 16th century. One of the first documented uses is found in Catholic bishop John Fisher’s work in the 1520s defending the sacrament of marriage. He wrote, “Like a fish that is taken out of the water, he can neither live nor breathe.”
In the 17th century, philosopher Thomas Hobbes used the metaphor to describe humankind in a hypothetical “state of nature” without civilization. He wrote that people would be “solitary, poor, nasty, brutish and short” in this condition, “like a fish out of water.”
By the 19th century, the idiom was in common parlance. Charles Dickens used it in his novel David Copperfield in 1850, writing “I was quite relieved to find that it was only Brooks of Sheffield; for, at first, I really thought it was I who was a fish out of water.”
Today, while the expression is over 470 years old, it remains a colorful way to convey feeling out of one’s depth or thrust into unfamiliar settings.
Defining “Fish Out of Water”
So what precisely does this oft-cited idiom mean? There are a few key definitions:
- Someone in an uncomfortable, unfamiliar situation where they feel awkward or out of place.
- A person lacking the experience or skills to thrive in a certain environment.
- An individual displaced from their typical cultural or social milieu.
In each case, “fish out of water” conveys the challenge of adjusting to new conditions or not fitting into prevailing norms. Like a fish on land, the person struggles to breathe, move, or function. The idiom highlights the disorientation of being outside one’s element.
Feeling Out of Place
We often use “fish out of water” to describe experiences like:
- Starting a new career or role we’re not prepared for
- Moving to a place where the culture and language are unfamiliar
- Attending gatherings with people we don’t know
- Traveling to a foreign country very different from our own
- Taking an elective class where we lack background knowledge
In these scenarios, we feel awkward, isolated, overwhelmed, or incapable of smoothly participating. Everything from social norms to basic tasks feels disorienting. We lack the confidence, relationships, and cultural fluency to thrive. Like a fish on land, we gasp for air in this foreign environment.
Lacking Relevant Skills
Consider a rookie employee fresh out of college working in an office for the first time. They likely feel totally unprepared and lost amid corporate jargon, office politics, and unfamiliar software programs.
Or imagine an introverted person attending a big networking event full of strangers. They probably wish to escape the loud, crowded space. Being naturally shy, they may have no idea how to mingle or make professional connections.
In both cases, individuals are “fish out of water” because they lack context and skills to smoothly operate in these settings. Their natural abilities and tendencies seem ineffective, so they founder awkwardly.
Displaced from One’s Culture
People may also feel like fish out of water when removed from their cultural context. An exchange student in a foreign landprobably struggles to follow local slang and humor. A rural farmer visiting a huge city for the first time might be overwhelmed by the crowds, traffic, and noise.
We thrive in environments that align with our upbringing, heritage, and identity. Being abruptly transported outside familiar cultural settings can profoundly disorient us. Every subtle cue from manners to dress code feels slightly off.
This culture shock means we may accidentally offend others or embarrass ourselves. We become hyper-aware of sticking out. Our instincts and assumptions cease working, leaving us scrambling to adjust.
Using “Fish Out of Water” in Conversation
This versatile idiom crops up regularly in everyday English, often describing experiences like:
- I felt totally out of place at their fancy cocktail party. I was a fish out of water wearing jeans!
- My dad grew up in a small town. When he moved to New York City, he was like a fish out of water.
- I know you’re nervous about your piano recital. But you’ve practiced so hard, you won’t feel like a fish out of water up there.
We also use it humorously or sarcastically to tease people stepping outside their comfort zone:
- Maggie is going on a blind date tonight. Watch her flounder around like a fish out of water trying to make small talk.
- James signed up for an improv comedy class? He’s going to be like a fish out of water trying to be spontaneous and witty.
The image of gaping and writhing like a fish stranded on land graphically sums up the thrashing panic we feel in new, disorienting situations. The idiom succinctly conveys being stripped of our instincts and confidence.
Feeling like a fish out of water reminds us just how much our social skills, knowledge, and comfort depend on environment. But while the sensation can be stressful, it is often temporary. With time and experience, we can adapt to unfamiliar settings and regain our footing.
Like a fish returned safely to water, we eventually calm down, orient ourselves, and learn to navigate new conditions. Slowly but surely, we regain our rhythm. Before long, we master the tasks, language, and conventions governing this new “pond.” Our confidence returns as we realize we can float perfectly fine in this habitat after all.
While initially jarring, that feeling of being a fish out of water often recedes as we evolve. We absorb fresh information enabling us to thrive. What first seemed so foreign becomes familiar. Where we once flailed helplessly, now we glide smoothly along.
So take heart next time you feel like a fish gasping desperately for breath. With patience and an open mind, even the most disorienting environment can start to feel like home.